Please allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Fat Brain.
I live inside of you and am a part of you. In fact, I am a piece of your brain....and I am responsible for every food binge you ever had, every time you 'slipped up' or went off program, every time you tried to have 'just one' and wound up on that slippery slope down to .... nowheresville.
I won't apologize for it, either...because that's WHO I AM and what I DO.
I am the part of your brain that remembers your old, bad eating habits.
That's my job! To remember them, and remind you of them, and try to get you to go back to them, because it was easier.
And not only do I remember them, but I cherish them!
I remember every piece of junk food you ever ate, and exactly how it tasted. All the wonderful gooey-creamy-sticky-sweet-salty-whatever 'ness' about each food.
(Of course, I do NOT remember how you felt afterwards...and don't remind me, because I don't 'go there'. I do NOT remember the guilt or the shame or the weight gain. These are secondary, 'not important' things to me).
Because they don't matter.
All that matters to me is getting you to do what you did 'before'.
They are the 'good old days' to me. And my entire purpose in life is to get you to GO BACK THERE again.
Why? Because it's easier! Because it's what I do....I'm the lazy CHILD within you, the one that whines and complains and just wants to EAT 'whatever' already, and is sick and tired of these stupid MF packets and wants to eat 'like everyone else' and wants a glass (or two or three) of wine and maybe a mixed drink and "oooh some of those Godiva chocolates don't THEY look good and I'll have a piece of cheesecake on the side, and a hot fudge sundae extra hot fudge....NO NUTS"
(LOL....Remember this? It's from one of my favorite movies, 'The Santa Claus' staring Tim Allen...when he's gaining weight because hello? He's SANTA but doesn't know it yet LOL)....
But I digress.
Anyway. I am the 4-year-old in the grocery cart wanting that shiny candy....she doesn't even know what it IS but it LOOKS good, and she remembers seeing that commercial on TV and all those happy smiling people eating it so it must be good, right?
And those people eating it are all GORGEOUS! They aren't fat...right?
So why NOT? I can be like them!
LOL....OK I'm exaggerating... but you get the idea.
I am FAT BRAIN.
I am a part of you and I'll NEVER EVER EVER GO AWAY.
The most you're going to be able to do, is to maybe, shut me up....shove me way back in the back of the closet and try and FORGET about me and never listen to me again.
But believe me, under the right conditions, just open the door a crack....and I'll be out, in all my glory again, whispering in your ear.
YELLING in your ear if I have to.
Here's some of the things I'll tell you:
- I'll whisper that 'one won't hurt'. This is an old but a goodie, but it WORKS. So I'll pull that one out, over and over again. You fall for it, too....many many times.
- I'll tell you it's 'not fair' that everyone else can eat 'X' when I can't.
I'll keep at you about this until you feel so deprived you'll do ANYTHING to go off program.
- I'll warn you that the meals are 'too expensive'. Of course I neglect to remind you about that $40. binge you had last week when you bought all that junk food from the grocery store and stuffed yourself with it...or all those pizzas you sent out for over the years...and the junk you bought to make cookies at Christmastime, and the Cheetos and nuts and pretzels and assorted gobbledegook you 'had' to have, week after week. I won't mention those. Or the dinners out or the ice cream or the cinnamon buns in the mall or...(you get the idea LOL).
- I'll tell you it's 'too late', your metabolism is already so messed up you'll 'never' be able to lose the weight. I'm especially good at this one on weeks when the scale doesn't move.
- Speaking of the scale...I'm an EXPERT in that category.
If you gained weight, I'll tell you 'What's the use?'
If you lost weight, I'll tell you 'You now have PERMISSION to eat!'
If you stayed the same I'll go back to 'What's the use?'
I've got an answer for everything. If the scale went up and you exercised, I'll blame it on the exercise (and NOT on the excess water your body retained automatically which will drain the next day).
If the scale went down, I'll insist it didn't go down FAST enough or FAR enough.
Oh yeah...I can work wonders with the scale. And the more you weigh in, the more chances I have to work on your head! That's the beautiful part....
- When you're out with friends I'll really hammer you with the 'It's not fair' logic. I'll make you feel embarrassed when you say 'I don't drink' or 'No, thank you' to the desserts....like you're some sort of pariah or something.
When you're with family I'll make you feel guilty when you turn down Mom's apple pie that she baked 'just for you'. When you go out to dinner I'll whisper that it's a 'special occasion' and you don't go out very often, so you should 'eat what you want' and 'make up for it tomorrow'.
I'm an EXPERT at this kind of logic, by the way.
In the cold light of day, with enough knowledge and experience, you can find myriad ways to defeat my crazy mixed-up logic....but see, I don't spring it on you when you're thinking clearly. I wait until you're vulnerable. I'm like a snake in the grass....poised and ready to strike when you least expect it, when you let your guard down.
And HOW and WHY can I get away with this?
Simple! I'm a PART of you! I know you intimately. I know all your weaknesses. I know what makes you tick! I can find a vulnerability and exploit it because I AM a part of your brain.
So WHY do I continue to hound you, even though it's not in your best interests? Even though you may die from a bunch of related illnesses such as diabetes and hypertension and possible heart attack, strokes, you name it? Even though being overweight makes you miserable?
I do it because it's WHAT I DO. Period.
I do it because it's EASIER to return to the old bad habits then to develop new, healthy ones.
I do it because I am an illogical child! My part of the brain is NOT concerned with what's rational or logical. Oh no!
I'm only interested in taking the easy way out.
I want you to CONTINUE to do exactly what you've been doing to date to gain all the weight.
I want you to sit in your LazyBoy recliner, with your food goodies all around you, and watch junky TV or funny movies or whatever....and eat eat eat till your heart's content. I don't are that you get overfull and even sick sometimes. I don't care that your stomach hurts because you've overstuffed it again. All I care about is the TASTE, the brief sensation that lasts only a few minutes in your mouth. That's all I care about.
When you come home from work and you're weary and stressed?
I'll pounce....I know this is a perfect moment for me to do so. I'll tell you, "You don't need to go through all that, making your L&G....it's too much trouble and it takes too long. Just screw it for tonight...pick up the phone and call for take out, and restart tomorrow".
Or I'll say "Just grab something quick....yeah, make some spaghetti, that's fast and easy....to hell with the carbs, I'll worry about that tomorrow."
And you can bet that the minute you 'blow it', I'll hound you about it.
I'll tell you, "Well you blew it now (amazing how I remember the details of the MF 5/1 plan, isn't it? But then, like I said, I'm a PART of you so I have all your intelligence!), you ate off plan! You ruined your weight loss and kicked yourself out of ketosis. Why are you even bothering at this point? So go off program the rest of the day and restart tomorrow".
I'm also big on keeping my eyes open for other diets...that maybe are 'better' or 'faster' or 'easier' or allow you to eat more off plan foods!
Then I'll tell you 'Why are you doing Medifast, anyway? It's SO expensive....it's ridiculous to pay all this money! You're not sticking to it anyway...so you might as well do SOMETHING ELSE....maybe...I've got it...South Beach! That's easy enough to follow, and you can have FRUIT! YEAH!'
Or I'll read in the tabloids as you're standing in line in the grocery store about this new 'guaranteed' diet endorsed (supposedly) by some movie star....and I'll read the sample menu and suddenly it seems so easy!....I mean, "Look, all you have to do is eat grapefruit 3x a day! And you can eat whatever you want!"
The latest diet pill craze? Whether it's raspberry ketones or acai berries or some strange very rare plant from the Amazon 'guaranteed' (again, or your money back!) to make you lose weight by curbing your appetite? Yeah, that'll work, I'll attack this thing from the SOURCE, my APPETITE! I'll make it so I DON'T WANT TO EAT!'
I'll swear to you up and down that THIS is the answer..... LOL
.....and all the while I'll be giggling to myself. Knowing I 'sucked you in' once again. Knowing you are being led astray...following the Pied Piper of Weight Loss, the all-knowing super-guru FAT BRAIN. Right?
Oh sure Fat Brain -must- have my best interest at heart, after all she's ME, right?
WRONG! She doesn't have your best interests at heart...despite being 'you'.
She's just your old bad habits. That's ALL!
So watch out for ME, Fat Brain, as you work through this program....because I'm always there...ready to strike, preferably at your weakest moment. And I make no apologies, this is what I am...this is what I do....and I'll never shut up and go away until YOU find other ways to cope with what I tell you.
If you ignore me enough, I WILL get quieter....but you didn't hear that from me, you hear?
After all, I LIKE being in charge. Woohoo! I get to have you going every which way but LOOSE. It's FUN to mess with your head! Wow, I can turn a great WEEK, and a weight loss, into a BINGE if I want to with enough (il)logic whispered in your ear! I'll tell you it's 'not true weight loss', it's just 'water', I'll whisper that you'll NEVER be able to keep it up....I'll tell you it's NOT ENOUGH....you thought you'd lose more...WAAAAAH!!!!
Oh yeah, I'm big on whining. It's one of my specialties!
So have some sympathy and taste for me....just like in 'Sympathy for the Devil' by the Rolling Stones....remember, I'm always here.....waiting...!!!
..................Listen, gang...this was all in fun but you get the meaning behind it. It's TRUE. Fat Brain is REAL. She IS a part of you and she's NOT going away.
Repeat after me: "She's just your OLD BAD HABITS. THAT'S ALL!"
Say this to yourself 3x a day, every day, when you wake up, and when you go to sleep. REMIND yourself of this fact OFTEN.
TRUST ME, it's important. If you want to lose the weight and keep it off FOREVER, you are going to have to deal with Fat Brain.
You can't just sweep her under the rug....because she's there. You have to acknowledge her, while NOT paying attention to her.
Not easy to do....but it can be done.
So it's up to US to put her in her place! Just say NO and IGNORE her!
No matter WHAT she says! Counter her ridiculous claims...laugh in her face for once! Tell her she's nuts, and you're NOT going there, period.
And you know what? You CAN put her 'back in the closet'....way back in the back there...and you can shut the door and LOCK the key....just remember she's never 'gone'.
If you open the door...that's a risk YOU take.
Remember that!
Keep on...and don't CAVE to the CRAVING!
I live inside of you and am a part of you. In fact, I am a piece of your brain....and I am responsible for every food binge you ever had, every time you 'slipped up' or went off program, every time you tried to have 'just one' and wound up on that slippery slope down to .... nowheresville.
I won't apologize for it, either...because that's WHO I AM and what I DO.
I am the part of your brain that remembers your old, bad eating habits.
That's my job! To remember them, and remind you of them, and try to get you to go back to them, because it was easier.
And not only do I remember them, but I cherish them!
I remember every piece of junk food you ever ate, and exactly how it tasted. All the wonderful gooey-creamy-sticky-sweet-salty-whatever 'ness' about each food.
(Of course, I do NOT remember how you felt afterwards...and don't remind me, because I don't 'go there'. I do NOT remember the guilt or the shame or the weight gain. These are secondary, 'not important' things to me).
Because they don't matter.
All that matters to me is getting you to do what you did 'before'.
They are the 'good old days' to me. And my entire purpose in life is to get you to GO BACK THERE again.
Why? Because it's easier! Because it's what I do....I'm the lazy CHILD within you, the one that whines and complains and just wants to EAT 'whatever' already, and is sick and tired of these stupid MF packets and wants to eat 'like everyone else' and wants a glass (or two or three) of wine and maybe a mixed drink and "oooh some of those Godiva chocolates don't THEY look good and I'll have a piece of cheesecake on the side, and a hot fudge sundae extra hot fudge....NO NUTS"
(LOL....Remember this? It's from one of my favorite movies, 'The Santa Claus' staring Tim Allen...when he's gaining weight because hello? He's SANTA but doesn't know it yet LOL)....
But I digress.
Anyway. I am the 4-year-old in the grocery cart wanting that shiny candy....she doesn't even know what it IS but it LOOKS good, and she remembers seeing that commercial on TV and all those happy smiling people eating it so it must be good, right?
And those people eating it are all GORGEOUS! They aren't fat...right?
So why NOT? I can be like them!
LOL....OK I'm exaggerating... but you get the idea.
I am FAT BRAIN.
I am a part of you and I'll NEVER EVER EVER GO AWAY.
The most you're going to be able to do, is to maybe, shut me up....shove me way back in the back of the closet and try and FORGET about me and never listen to me again.
But believe me, under the right conditions, just open the door a crack....and I'll be out, in all my glory again, whispering in your ear.
YELLING in your ear if I have to.
Here's some of the things I'll tell you:
- I'll whisper that 'one won't hurt'. This is an old but a goodie, but it WORKS. So I'll pull that one out, over and over again. You fall for it, too....many many times.
- I'll tell you it's 'not fair' that everyone else can eat 'X' when I can't.
I'll keep at you about this until you feel so deprived you'll do ANYTHING to go off program.
- I'll warn you that the meals are 'too expensive'. Of course I neglect to remind you about that $40. binge you had last week when you bought all that junk food from the grocery store and stuffed yourself with it...or all those pizzas you sent out for over the years...and the junk you bought to make cookies at Christmastime, and the Cheetos and nuts and pretzels and assorted gobbledegook you 'had' to have, week after week. I won't mention those. Or the dinners out or the ice cream or the cinnamon buns in the mall or...(you get the idea LOL).
- I'll tell you it's 'too late', your metabolism is already so messed up you'll 'never' be able to lose the weight. I'm especially good at this one on weeks when the scale doesn't move.
- Speaking of the scale...I'm an EXPERT in that category.
If you gained weight, I'll tell you 'What's the use?'
If you lost weight, I'll tell you 'You now have PERMISSION to eat!'
If you stayed the same I'll go back to 'What's the use?'
I've got an answer for everything. If the scale went up and you exercised, I'll blame it on the exercise (and NOT on the excess water your body retained automatically which will drain the next day).
If the scale went down, I'll insist it didn't go down FAST enough or FAR enough.
Oh yeah...I can work wonders with the scale. And the more you weigh in, the more chances I have to work on your head! That's the beautiful part....
- When you're out with friends I'll really hammer you with the 'It's not fair' logic. I'll make you feel embarrassed when you say 'I don't drink' or 'No, thank you' to the desserts....like you're some sort of pariah or something.
When you're with family I'll make you feel guilty when you turn down Mom's apple pie that she baked 'just for you'. When you go out to dinner I'll whisper that it's a 'special occasion' and you don't go out very often, so you should 'eat what you want' and 'make up for it tomorrow'.
I'm an EXPERT at this kind of logic, by the way.
In the cold light of day, with enough knowledge and experience, you can find myriad ways to defeat my crazy mixed-up logic....but see, I don't spring it on you when you're thinking clearly. I wait until you're vulnerable. I'm like a snake in the grass....poised and ready to strike when you least expect it, when you let your guard down.
And HOW and WHY can I get away with this?
Simple! I'm a PART of you! I know you intimately. I know all your weaknesses. I know what makes you tick! I can find a vulnerability and exploit it because I AM a part of your brain.
So WHY do I continue to hound you, even though it's not in your best interests? Even though you may die from a bunch of related illnesses such as diabetes and hypertension and possible heart attack, strokes, you name it? Even though being overweight makes you miserable?
I do it because it's WHAT I DO. Period.
I do it because it's EASIER to return to the old bad habits then to develop new, healthy ones.
I do it because I am an illogical child! My part of the brain is NOT concerned with what's rational or logical. Oh no!
I'm only interested in taking the easy way out.
I want you to CONTINUE to do exactly what you've been doing to date to gain all the weight.
I want you to sit in your LazyBoy recliner, with your food goodies all around you, and watch junky TV or funny movies or whatever....and eat eat eat till your heart's content. I don't are that you get overfull and even sick sometimes. I don't care that your stomach hurts because you've overstuffed it again. All I care about is the TASTE, the brief sensation that lasts only a few minutes in your mouth. That's all I care about.
When you come home from work and you're weary and stressed?
I'll pounce....I know this is a perfect moment for me to do so. I'll tell you, "You don't need to go through all that, making your L&G....it's too much trouble and it takes too long. Just screw it for tonight...pick up the phone and call for take out, and restart tomorrow".
Or I'll say "Just grab something quick....yeah, make some spaghetti, that's fast and easy....to hell with the carbs, I'll worry about that tomorrow."
And you can bet that the minute you 'blow it', I'll hound you about it.
I'll tell you, "Well you blew it now (amazing how I remember the details of the MF 5/1 plan, isn't it? But then, like I said, I'm a PART of you so I have all your intelligence!), you ate off plan! You ruined your weight loss and kicked yourself out of ketosis. Why are you even bothering at this point? So go off program the rest of the day and restart tomorrow".
I'm also big on keeping my eyes open for other diets...that maybe are 'better' or 'faster' or 'easier' or allow you to eat more off plan foods!
Then I'll tell you 'Why are you doing Medifast, anyway? It's SO expensive....it's ridiculous to pay all this money! You're not sticking to it anyway...so you might as well do SOMETHING ELSE....maybe...I've got it...South Beach! That's easy enough to follow, and you can have FRUIT! YEAH!'
Or I'll read in the tabloids as you're standing in line in the grocery store about this new 'guaranteed' diet endorsed (supposedly) by some movie star....and I'll read the sample menu and suddenly it seems so easy!....I mean, "Look, all you have to do is eat grapefruit 3x a day! And you can eat whatever you want!"
The latest diet pill craze? Whether it's raspberry ketones or acai berries or some strange very rare plant from the Amazon 'guaranteed' (again, or your money back!) to make you lose weight by curbing your appetite? Yeah, that'll work, I'll attack this thing from the SOURCE, my APPETITE! I'll make it so I DON'T WANT TO EAT!'
I'll swear to you up and down that THIS is the answer..... LOL
.....and all the while I'll be giggling to myself. Knowing I 'sucked you in' once again. Knowing you are being led astray...following the Pied Piper of Weight Loss, the all-knowing super-guru FAT BRAIN. Right?
Oh sure Fat Brain -must- have my best interest at heart, after all she's ME, right?
WRONG! She doesn't have your best interests at heart...despite being 'you'.
She's just your old bad habits. That's ALL!
So watch out for ME, Fat Brain, as you work through this program....because I'm always there...ready to strike, preferably at your weakest moment. And I make no apologies, this is what I am...this is what I do....and I'll never shut up and go away until YOU find other ways to cope with what I tell you.
If you ignore me enough, I WILL get quieter....but you didn't hear that from me, you hear?
After all, I LIKE being in charge. Woohoo! I get to have you going every which way but LOOSE. It's FUN to mess with your head! Wow, I can turn a great WEEK, and a weight loss, into a BINGE if I want to with enough (il)logic whispered in your ear! I'll tell you it's 'not true weight loss', it's just 'water', I'll whisper that you'll NEVER be able to keep it up....I'll tell you it's NOT ENOUGH....you thought you'd lose more...WAAAAAH!!!!
Oh yeah, I'm big on whining. It's one of my specialties!
So have some sympathy and taste for me....just like in 'Sympathy for the Devil' by the Rolling Stones....remember, I'm always here.....waiting...!!!
..................Listen, gang...this was all in fun but you get the meaning behind it. It's TRUE. Fat Brain is REAL. She IS a part of you and she's NOT going away.
Repeat after me: "She's just your OLD BAD HABITS. THAT'S ALL!"
Say this to yourself 3x a day, every day, when you wake up, and when you go to sleep. REMIND yourself of this fact OFTEN.
TRUST ME, it's important. If you want to lose the weight and keep it off FOREVER, you are going to have to deal with Fat Brain.
You can't just sweep her under the rug....because she's there. You have to acknowledge her, while NOT paying attention to her.
Not easy to do....but it can be done.
So it's up to US to put her in her place! Just say NO and IGNORE her!
No matter WHAT she says! Counter her ridiculous claims...laugh in her face for once! Tell her she's nuts, and you're NOT going there, period.
And you know what? You CAN put her 'back in the closet'....way back in the back there...and you can shut the door and LOCK the key....just remember she's never 'gone'.
If you open the door...that's a risk YOU take.
Remember that!
Keep on...and don't CAVE to the CRAVING!
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