It ALL Counts!

Starting over?

Well, the first thing I want to tell you is to STOP beating yourself up for whatever mistakes you made to get you here.

Because each and every bit of experience you have had, COUNTS.
It all adds up.

I know it feels like it was a waste.  Like you're going 'round and 'round in circles, getting nowhere.

I know you feel like you're beating your head against a wall sometimes, like you'll NEVER 'get it'. 

After all, how many times can you repeat the same dumb mistakes, right?

How many times have you overeaten?  Or binged?  And hated yourself afterwards?

We can't understand it.  We aren't stupid, most of us....so WHY? 

Why is it that we can do so many other things 'right'....we can have successful careers, run our households, be the organizer or central hub that our families and/or friends depend upon, do SO many things well.....yet we can't do a simple thing like control our eating? 

What the heck is WRONG with us?

Listen to me.  There is NOTHING wrong with you. 

NOTHING.  Absolutely NOTHING.

Because this isn't like long division.  You don't learn it and then that's 'it', you're done.

This is a CONTINUAL learning process.  A LIFELONG journey. 

I know you don't want to hear that.  You want to have it 'once and done'.  We're all so busy in our lives, we don't have patience for a slow learning process based on experience.

But it's necessary. 

Because there's a LOT to learn.  And a lot of the things we have to learn, we have to learn OVER AND OVER AND OVER again in order for it to really, once and for all, sink in to the point where we decide 'No MORE!' and we change.

And that's OK.  We're human.  And we're unique.  So each of us has our OWN specific, unique, learning curve, and our own specific, unique, trials and failures and successes that ALL combine to teach us what we NEED to learn to get to where we want to go. 

But every time you fight a battle and WIN, your brain REMEMBERS.  It stores that information.  You may not realize it, but it's all up there.  All of it.  Every tiny bit of data, all the things you learned about nutrition, calorie counts, what's good/not-so-good in terms of your eating habits, what has protein, what doesn't, what veggies have the lowest glycemic index and/or calories and make you feel fullest (and you LIKE), etc.etc. 

LOTS and LOTS of data.  Every day.  Our brains are like high-speed digital recorders working silently and swiftly in the background, storing it all.

And it WILL all come together in your head. Sometimes slowly but surely, but sometimes all at once, in a flash!  You get an 'AHA' moment, and suddenly you change ONE aspect of what you've been doing, permanently.  Just like that.  Because it finally sunk in, you KNOW what to do now, you KNOW the outcome if you eat it versus don't eat it....and you make the right choice.

And because we all have zillions of thoughts each and every day, and because those of us with food addictions have a 'voice' inside our head that is constantly arguing that we NEED to eat sludge, and because we've learned to handle our uncomfortable emotions with comfort food (there's a reason it's called comfort food!)....this learning process has to continue to happen with each and every one of our bad habits and errors in thinking. 

Everything "Fat Brain" tells us...all those lies and arguments...have to be refuted, by YOU, in time.  So that she shuts up and can't use them again because you KNOW better. 

So...where's the 'end point'?

Well, there IS no end point.  This is a never-ending journey, one you'll be on for the rest of your life. 

You don't reach goal and say "I'm DONE!" and you're 'frozen' like that and you never have to worry about overeating or gaining weight again.

(In fact, for many of us, this is where the REAL trial begins).....But I digress.  That's a subject for another blog.

My point is we NEVER stop learning, and that's a GOOD thing!  Because it also means we NEVER stop ... IMPROVING!

You are getting better every single day.  YES!  You ARE!

Look at where you are NOW, versus where you WERE.  

You can see that you've learned, you've grown up in a lot of ways, and there are certain things you won't do 'again' because you've been there, done that, and it taught you what NOT to do.  Right?

Things like fad diets...cabbage soup, anyone?  LOL.  Or .. diet pills, you know, the ones they advertise that have zillions sold and have photoshopped pictures of people 'before' and 'after'.  And in fine print it says "Participants followed a low calorie diet and exercised in addiction to take the Miracle Pill".  LOL.

You learned the hard way. 

And that's how we ALL learn.

Which is OK!

FORGIVE YOURSELF for failing, because you NEEDED to.  You did!  At that specific point in time, you NEEDED to 'try' the wrong way, in order to see, once and for all, that it doesn't WORK for you.  So that you change.

So there IS hope.  Because all those experiences, all those 'experiments', all those false starts and stops, all those times you tried and failed, are STORED in our brains and RETAINED.

Our brains are marvelous entities.  They can store vast amounts of data, and they remember EVERYTHING.  Maybe you can't 'pull it forward' all the time, but the information is in there, the memory is in there, and it all COUNTS.

It all adds up and can come together in your head when you least expect it.  And then you make a decision - a permanent decision -  in regards to your food plan and your eating -- and you move FORWARD 3 steps. With whatever aspect you've been wrestling with.

And that's a good thing!

Right now I'm in Day 18 100% OP and I'm feeling like everything I've been through these past several years is coalescing in my head.  It's all coming together to bring me to where I am right NOW at this very moment.  All my mistakes, all my screw-ups, all my binges and times I cried myself to sleep....they have all TAUGHT me lessons that were important for me to learn. 

I've learned a lot, and I know it.  And I'm proud of that knowledge!  So I have faith that I'll get back to goal ...but I'm not stressing over 'when' or how much I lose on a weekly basis, or jumping on and off the scale, either. I'm not even logging and counting calories!  Because I don't NEED to. 

The program I'm on, WORKS.  Period. 

So I'm just staying OP (on program).  Every day.  PERIOD.

The PEACE of no longer fighting the addiction, of understanding that this is the way I need to live for my SANITY!.....is incredible. 

And gang...I started this way back in February 2012.  So we're talking 3 YEARS+ worth of trial and error. 
Not counting, of course, the 40+ years of failed dieting attempts before I started the Medifast program. 
Which all counted, too...it's just that my learning went up RAPIDLY when I joined Medifast, because I finally was open to it, and ready for it.
"The teacher appears when the student is ready".

Everything happens when it NEEDS to happen. 

And I'm not 'done'.  I'll NEVER be 'done'.  Hopefully I'll get back to goal and stay there, but I know I'll still have my failures and I'll still be learning.

So never, ever, give up, and never get down on yourself.  YOU ARE LEARNING.  That's the important thing.  You aren't giving up on yourself.  Every day you store NEW data, NEW information about yourself, your nutrition, your lifestyle, and your choices....and every day COUNTS.  Even the days (ESPECIALLY the days) when you go hog-wild off program.  You may hate yourself afterwards, but believe me, your brain is listening and it has LEARNED from that mistake. Even if you have to repeat it over and over again to really change your behavior. 

So keep on keepin' on....and don't be ashamed, don't be mad at yourself, dry your eyes and be happy you're alive and still have a chance. 

Because you do, you know. 

As long as you have a breath left in you, you have a chance to GET.IT.RIGHT. 

Wishing you a peaceful on-plan (whatever your food plan) day! 

Linda
angiecat6@comcast.net