It's about CHOICE!

I woke up this morning with a bad case of the Monday morning blues.

First of all, I overslept. Never a good thing. Then I stepped on the scale  Didn't like what I saw. At ALL.
 
I reminded myself that I didn't measure appropriately at dinner last night, and my meal was high in sodium.  Therefore I could have eaten too much, and/or I could be retaining water.  It happens.  Also, I didn't sleep well last night.  (believe it or not THAT can affect the scale as well).  Plus I don't even have a really accurate 'starting point', since I last weighed in BEFORE I had a bad eating day a little less than a week ago. (oh - and it's only been 6 days, not 7).  So I could've started a lot higher than I thought I did.
Lastly, it's not like I can lose 10 lbs. a week anymore.....I'm not 235 lbs anymore.  We're talking a few extra 'didn't pay attention' pounds, that's all.

I know all these things intellectually.  But it doesn't make it easier emotionally, does it?

I mean, we ALL get upset when the scale doesn't cooperate.  We try NOT to, but it does tend to ruin your day, let's face it. 

Little by Little...

Good Sunday morning, everyone!

The hardest day of the week for me.  And for many of us.

Which is weird, right?  I mean, it's also....for most of us....the 'best' day of the week because we have lots of leisure time, and we're with family and friends doing what we LIKE to do, what we CHOOSE to do, instead of what we 'HAVE' to do.

But sometimes, that's precisely what gets us into trouble!

Too many choices.  Too much temptation.  Too many bad habits staring us in the face....triggers, like sitting in your favorite chair watching your favorite TV show.  Or going out with the gang at night. Sometimes just 'that' can be a trigger, because you 'always' used to eat _________ (insert food here!) at that point in time.  Right?

Exercise!

It's time for my periodic motivational speech on exercise LOL.

Seriously, are you working out?  Are you planning to work out?

If you just started the program, you get a 'pass'....for at least 2-3 weeks (I know you're anxious to get the weight off, but WAIT....please!  Your body is going through too many changes right now), but if not...

What are you waiting for?

It's up to YOU to find a way to MOVE more.  That's all.  Just MOVE.
A friend of mine just walked up and down her hallway for the first couple of months!
Another does the 10,000 steps thing (I never DID get into that, but my personality just wasn't suited to it I guess). 
Yet another does stair climbing.
It doesn't matter WHAT it is, as long as you MOVE.

And do it consistently.

It's not the intensity that matters, it's the consistency. Whether it's walks around the building (or the block) after lunch at work, or doing a Pilates DVD at home every night, or joining a gym, or starting a running program, or taking an exercise class once a week, start SOMEWHERE.  Make a commitment to find something you enjoy and do it.

Find your passion!

I confess.

I have a secret weapon that I've used to help get me to goal.

It's stupid but it works.

Ready?

I keep BUSY. I keep busy with my hands, my fingers, and my brain. I do this by reading blogs, writing blogs, commenting on this website, and reading.

And not always reading books about binge eating or food addiction, either. Let's face it, sometimes we need pure escapism.

So I love reading novels like best-selling thrillers...(you know, US Navy Seals take on the terrorists and win novels). Brad Thor is my current favorite author.

Failure IS an option!

"I screwed up".

Why is it we can't say these three little words sometimes?

Why is it we get all ashamed, embarrassed, afraid to admit it?

EVERYONE screws up.  It's part of being human!

And on this plan, more than most, I think, IF you're here for the long haul (and I hope you are!), you are going to have to learn how to deal with failure.  

Because things happen.  That's just...life!

There WILL be times when you find yourself without an MF bar or pretzels or something available, and you're out, and it's been 4-1/2 hours and you're STARVED and so you grab ... 'whatever' and then...you hate yourself.

It's not the end of the world.  Just go right back OP the very next meal.  Forgive yourself and move on. Learn a lesson from it (i.e, put THREE bars in your purse…and two in your car’s console…right NOW! LOL)....and move on.

You are also going to have to learn to deal with things you 'used to deal with' with food, without food.

I mean, that's the definition of a food addict, right? Our 'drug of choice' is food! 

So when we get lonely, or angry, or upset, or stressed, or anxious, or frustrated, or depressed, or....whatever (sometimes even multiple emotions all at once) ... when life hands us lemons, when we wake up on the wrong side of the bed and the kids are a pain and your husband is mad at you and you lost your left shoe and you're late for work and everything's going wrong....

You have to stop, take a deep breath, and tell yourself 'This too shall pass'....and get through it.

Is it WORTH IT?

So I was thinking this morning....is all this WORTH it? 

At the time I was in the ladies room at the gym.  I was tired, sweaty, and my arms and back hurt after my workout. 

I had my MF cereal with Almond Breeze, then dashed to the gym, had a bar mid morning after my little personal training session (I only pay for 30 minutes), and then did the treadmill for a bit. And I'm sweaty and hot and thirsty and sucking down the water.

And I looked in the mirror and said ....  "YES! It's worth it!"

It's so so worth it.  My husband calls me 'gorgeous' anymore (and the funny thing is, we've been married for nearly 30 years, but he didn't start doing that until I reached goal).  Seriously, in text messages when I tell him I'm home safe he always responds, "That's great, gorgeous" (sometimes he misspells gorgeous but who cares?  So he can't spell...LOL..."verbal ability is a highly overrated thing in a guy" (quick, what movie is that from?).....  :)

Accountability!

I used to make calendars whenever I started I new weight loss program.....let's see....if I lose 2 lbs a week that means I'll be X lbs in October, by Halloween I'll be Y, and by Thanksgiving I'll be Z, and by Christmas, whoa by Christmas I'll be looking SO good I'll be weighing XY!   LOL.....

I've learned the hard way that 'predicting' my weight loss is an exercise in futility, but I capitalized on my own 'analness' when it came to tracking and planning. 
I'm the QUEEN of tracking!  LOL!
Seriously. I LOVE it. 

So I got to thinking this Monday morning, as we all start off a new week, what would really help me to stay on track for the next 30 days.  I mean totally OP for 30 days, right?  How great would that be?  How much weight could YOU lose in 30 days completely totally OP?
Right?

Ketosis Confusion!

You know, sometimes the depth of my own confusion....and my own COMPULSIONS regarding eating...amazes even ME. 
LOL.

A friend, this past week, talked about Ketostix.

And that started me on an "Odyssey of Discovery" about Ketostix, ketosis, and the whole low low carb thing.

I bought a book called "Keto Clarity" (I DON'T recommend it, by the way.... how's THAT for a switch?....because it will only screw with your head just like it did mine!) by Jimmy Moore. 

The books SOUNDS like a dream come true.  I mean, you can eat FAT!  Yay! I'll be able to eat my Skippy!  WOW!  And look!  He lost over 300 lbs! 

But careful reading....and actually sitting down and designing a MENU....I saw differently. 

The 4 step Process to handling Cravings or Urges to Overeat

Here's a four-step process to stopping a binge before it starts, and I think it can be very helpful.

STEP ONE:  Capture your self-defeating thought.Through the practice of observation, take a look and see if there is a certain event, issue, or drama -- whether real or imagined -- that has been taking up a lot of your time and energy lately.  (Hint: this is usually what you're thinking deep inside, right BEFORE that craving!):
Example 1: "I never should have eaten that".
Example 2: "I'll never be able to lose this weight".

Once you have identified the thought, take a look at whether this something that happened in the past, or is something you have projected into the future.

Example 1: "The thought 'I shouldn't have eaten that' is reflecting something that happened in the past.  I am beating myself up because I ate that __________."
Example 2: "The thought 'I will never be able to lose weight' is a projection into the future.  I am fearful that I will spend the rest of my life fat and unhappy".

Either one is NOT living in the present.  (HINT:  If you want to be happy?  Live in the PRESENT, not the past or the future!)

And look at the meaning you have given the words, AND the feelings they invoke.
For example, in the first example, you may have given yourself the meaning that since you ate that off program food (or extra meal or too much food, whatever) you therefore are 'stupid' and 'can't do anything right'.  The feeling that goes along with this may be shame, guilt and remorse. (those are all useless emotions that do NOTHING but drag you down).

Binge Rules

Many of us struggle with binge eating. 

As I continue to unravel the reasons behind my own bingeing, and continue to work on making them 'less and less'.....I've discovered some things that might help.

Here are my 'Bingeing Rules' that I've learned through cold, hard experience.

This is a work in progress (as am I!)....but hopefully this will give you something to think about the next time you binge. And maybe it will even prevent a small binge from becoming a major one!

1.  If you succumb to a binge and go out and buy off program foods?  Whatever you don't finish, THROW OUT and get it out of your house immediately.  And I mean, get it TOTALLY out.  Bury it way way down in the garbage under other stuff so it's too disgusting to retrieve, and get that garbage out ASAP.  The last thing you need is for that food to be haunting you afterwards. 
And don't think you can 'keep it around for your family', because trust me, they won't finish it soon enough....and it will be there, staring you in the face when you're all alone and having an emotional meltdown. Not good!

2.  Do NOT skip your next meal after a binge to 'make up for it'.  OK, I realize you're stuffed right now.  Overstuffed, even.  You're thinking you'd love it if you could swear off food FOREVER.  But make your next meal anyway, as if you were OP.  This does several things:

a).  It keeps you from having to answer embarrassing questions from family members who suspect you've binged if you suddenly announce 'I'm not eating tonight' or just try and get away with a small salad (they will know, believe me).

b).  Your body processes the food pretty darn quickly.  So you WILL be physically hungry just a few hours later -- even though emotionally you don't want to eat -- so at least you'll be eating OP foods again.  If you go the other way, your physical hunger can 'win out', and then, since you 'blew it anyway', guess what you're going to eat?  Nothing good for you, trust me...! LOL

c).  It avoids that "Oh to hell with it -- I'll restart in the morning" thinking that always leads one place - to worsening or prolonging the binge.  Now an extra 500 calories becomes 500 more.  Or more than that! 

Even if you can't finish your L&G or that MF bar that's your next meal (sometimes they taste like cardboard to me after a binge), you're still back OP.  That in itself can make you feel better.  If you really can't finish it, stop eating and throw the rest away.  But do NOT give Fat Brain the excuse that she's hungry again, and that you should eat something ELSE off plan because you 'blew it anyway'.

3).  Go back OP the next morning.  The very next morning, even if it's over a weekend.  If you can, go back OP the very next MEAL (see #2 above)....but at the very least, get back OP the next morning.  As if nothing happened.  

How do I get back on track?

The #1 question people seem to ask here, over and over again...is...

How do I get back on track once I've 'lost' my mojo?
It happens to everyone sooner or later.  Even the most diligent, dedicated MFer runs into problems now and then.  Fat Brain talks us into 'one more', which leads to another, and maybe another...and pretty soon you're getting more and more lax.  You stop weighing and measuring. You stop tracking. You start making excuses on a daily basis. And suddenly, despite your best efforts, you can't even stay OP for one solid day. 

OR you stay OP for one day, go off the next.  OP/off plan/OP/off plan....over and over again. ARGH.  Right?

Believe me, 'been there, done that'.

Well, what's the answer?

Well, first of all I think it's important to realize that getting off track HAPPENS.  And it happens to everyone sooner or later. 

It's almost inevitable.....because we're human, and because everything in life changes. 

After all, you can't 'freeze' everything to stay exactly the same so you can stay 100% OP and continue to sail forever.  Even if you get through the entire 5/1 without a hitch, sooner or later -- maybe in Transition, maybe not until Maintenance -- you will hit a point where you lose your mojo.  The magic is gone. You are eating extra food. More MF meals than you should. Non-program food.  Extra bites, licks and tastes that may have led to a full-fledged binge.  Or even, mini-binges that plague you....every couple of days!
 
So how do you get back on track?
I believe that the answer is as unique as WE are.  What works for me might not work for you! 

Am I FULL?

Last night at dinner I got a kick out of watching my husband, and it got me to thinking. He had overdone it on the pretzels right before dinner...despite the fact that he knew I was making it, I remind him, etc. but hey....he's going to do what he's going to do, right? LOL...

Anyway, so he sits down to dinner, manages to eat about half of it, but I could tell he was struggling, and then he starts pushing his food around on his plate like a 4-year-old.

I said, "You ate too many pretzels again, didn't you?" "Yes", he said with sheepish smile. "No problem", I said. ....I certainly don't want him to force himself....so I smiled, shook my head, and stored it for another time (thankfully he WILL eat leftovers).

[He keeps doing this with the pretzels over and over again, and it's become an unhealthy habit....but that's another blog LOL.]

Bottom line, though, is he said, "I'm FULL".

And I thought about that.