Finding out who I AM!

A strange thing seems to happen when we go through our MF journeys and lose the weight....sometimes, we find OURSELVES!

I've been feeling, more and more lately, that I'm "coming into my own", really finding out who I AM after all these years.
(Which is weird, at age 58, to say the least! LOL!)

But without the "shoulds" in my life -- you know, I "should" be a good daughter, I "should" be a good student, I "should" be a good neighbor and a " good girl" and all the rest -- many of which I seem to have DISCARDED (or greatly revised, anyway) along the way, I'm discarding all the stuff I don't really want to do or be and instead doing what I want to do for a change. What a revelation!

It's nothing drastic, mind you. It's not like I'm suddenly going to become a bank robber or stripper or something (God forbid! LOL!)
BUT....it's little things, little changes I've made in my responses to people sometimes, in the number of times I've had to say 'NO' to food pushers, in the inner strength I've had to develop to STAY OP that has 'carried over' into other areas of my life!  It's in my attititude about things that has strengthened me inside and made me into a stronger, more confident woman.

I don't agree with everyone ANYONE says anymore...(and Yes, I've been guilty of that in the past. I was always so afraid of "offending" people, or so afraid they wouldn't "like" me, that I'd agree the sun was PURPLE if the right person said it at the right time. NO MORE!)

At restaurants? I wouldn't dream of ordering "off the menu" or asking for anything different -- because OMG, they might say "NO"! 
(Despite the fact that I was paying for it! How NUTS is that?)

At home? I'm vastly different....(as my hubby can attest to LOL).  If I'm angry, I SHOW it, I don't squash it down and stuff my face instead like I used to. I open my mouth and SAY how I feel. This has bothered my husband and those closest to me because hey, any change is a little unsettling, isn't it? But you know what? They got USED to it! They got OVER it and wound up respecting me MORE for it!

It's true! People RESPECT you more when you respect YOURSELF.

You get TREATED BETTER when you have some self-love and self-pride. It doesn't mean you're snide or rude or selfish, it just means you're confident, that's all!

When you're confident and you can hold your head up proudly and express yourself, you have NOTHING to be ashamed of -- and people respond to that strength by giving you the courtesy and respect you deserve! When you ask for what you want (nicely) and you make your own mind up, people admire that. They might not agree with you but that's OK! "Different strokes", right? 

It doesn't make you a bitch -- it makes you an independent, strong, confident person. And BRAVO to that!

The other day I got new eyeglasses and I insisted (finally!) that I wanted plastic frames, not wire rimmed ones. I HATE wire rims -- they are too fragile for me, they break easier, they're "touchier" and are so NOT ME!  I'm hard on things, generally. And with all my gym work, I need glasses I can yank off if I have to and not have to worry about breaking them if I look at them cross-eyed, you know? LOL

So I got a set of big brown plastic frames and they are more ME than any glasses I've owned in 10 years! 

Now, I ask you. How SILLY was it of me to be talked into something I didn't like before -- just because it was "all the rage"?

NO WAY. NEVER AGAIN.

You know what? I don't CARE what people think of me anymore. I am who I am, PERIOD. And I will NOT pretend to be any different!

As you move through your personal weight loss journey, you may find, as I did, that a LOT more than just your weight changes. You leave behind a lot of garbage you've been carrying around -- emotional baggage that maybe you've carried for YEARS -- and finally begin expressing who you are and what you want.

Don't be afraid of thee changes. They are the REAL YOU coming to the surface, finally, after all those years of hiding and pretending to be something you aren't. Embrace the changes and celebrate your uniqueness along with trying new foods -- maybe some healthy choices you never considered before (zucchini ribbions? Mashed Cauliflower? Roasted veggies? Kale? Tofu? You name it! LOL)....

You may discover some other new things to enjoy that you aren't spending so much time EATING (or planning to eat, or dreaming about eating, or recovering from overeating LOL)....

When your food intake starts to moderate and 'smooth out', without the "feast or famine" mentality, your mind will naturally look for OTHER things to do -- other challenges, other dreams for yourself.

And that's WONDERFUL!

Move forward ... ever forward. Those in your life that can't handle it? They will have 2 choices -- either deal with the "new you" OR decide to leave. It's their chocie. But YOU, be YOU.

To be anything less is a denial of your SPIRIT and your SOUL -- and that is the real tragedy of obesity and food addiction -- the denial of SELF.

KEEP ON!