"Everything in Moderation"

"Everything in moderation".

How many of us have heard that phrase?

But for US, that's impossible. And a lot of our problems come in because we refuse to accept that one fact!  We're food addicts.  Compulsive overeaters. It's what we DO.

When life hands us lemons, we don't make lemonade....we make lemon meringue PIE.  LOL.

So 'everything in moderation' has NO meaning for us.

Food is our drug. And we'll go back to its comfort again and again if we haven't learned other life skills to replace our eating. 

Moreover, certain foods can and will act like triggers and we can't stop. Even if we stop in front of others, when we're alone?  We can't help but continue eating in private.


So NO, 'everything in moderation' does not apply to me.

But let's break it down into its components.
"Everything"?  Sorry, but no way.  Sugar, sludge, and alcohol are off my menu totally. I had to say goodbye to them FOREVER.

And that's the problem. How many of us don't want to do that?  How many of us REFUSE to do that, in fact?  We fight it.  We tell ourselves that when we reach goal, we'll be able to eat 'anything'.
And sure, you can eat anything. No one's going to stop you. And you can even get away with it....for awhile.

But trust me, sooner or later it's going to add up. Either the sludge/sugar/junky stuff is going to make you hungrier and eat too much, or just the fact that the food you're eating is DEVOID of any real nutrition (but high in fat and sugar and carbs!) is going to make those little fat cells in your body swell up again, so fast it'll make your head spin.

But we 'experiment' with those foods anyway. We tell ourselves it's 'not fair' that we can't eat them anymore. ACCEPTANCE is what it takes, and if you're not ready to accept it, then you're doomed to repeat the same mistakes over and over and over again, until one day you wake up and realize that the food is FLEETING, but your body is PERMANENT.  You have to live with yourself every day. That junk you ate last night is working its way around your waist.  You can't just 'will' it away, you can't exercise it away, all you can do is resolve to STOP eating the sludge in the first place!

So OK, that takes care of the 'Everything' part.

What about the 'in moderation' part?  What if I just ate healthy foods.....like, say, lots of protein, and 'good' carbs (full of fiber, that net carbs thing, I'll just look for those!) and a bunch of salads, and I'll be FINE!
I mean, it's greek YOGURT for God's sakes. Right?

We 'experiment' with that concept....THINKING we can eat 'like normal people'.  I know I did!  Even after being on this program for over a year and half, when I finally made it all the way through Transition and got to Maintenance?  Despite hearing advice on what my TEE was, I had to see for myself.

And sure enough, when I went over my caloric allotment, I gained. It didn't matter how I tried to jimmy the numbers, guess what?

You eat too much, you gain weight.

The only possible exception?  Lettuce.  LOL.

Quantity matters to us, too.  We can overdo it quick-as-a-flash.

I could get into trouble (and again, I saw for myself....which I think everyone has to). 
Sooner or later I was overdoing on the quantity.  And maybe I was OK for a little while....Oh, this is great, look at all I get to EAT now!.....but the quantities kept getting higher and I found myself craving different trigger foods (which can change, that's the dastardly thing about trigger foods- even HEALTHY trigger foods), and looking for ways to have MORE of them, and pretty soon I was gaining weight. 
Again.

So not only did I need to regulate myself 'off' of certain foods....outlaw them completely!....but I also had to come up with a food plan in terms of quantity. Which meant, living within my TEE.  No more 'no holds barred'. Those days are long gone. Everything 'counts', one way or the other. So either I plan for 'X' amount of it, and that's ALL I eat, or it's off the menu because I know I won't be able to stop at 'just a little'.

One is never enough for me.  

So the next time some well-meaning friend or relative says "Just do everything in moderation, that's what I do", smile, nod, and shake your head to yourself.

You KNOW better.

"Everything in moderation" does NOT apply to us. And deep down, you probably know it....it's just a question of acceptance.

THIS time, resolve to go ALL THE WAY and to really EMBED that lesson into your head. 

And remember this:
You're not here to get to that 'magic number'. (well, you are, let's face it...but that's only PART of it).  You're here to learn how to STAY THERE!

I mean, what GOOD is it if you are just going on another roller-coaster ride?  Skinny, fat, skinny, fat, skinny, fat.  Where does it end? What does that do to your head?
Meanwhile life is passing you by....and you're not enjoying it, you're too fixated on your latest "diet" or fretting about your weight. AGAIN.

Enough already. Right?  That's the point I think you have to reach. Where you say ENOUGH and face the facts.

That's what I had to do. When I came here, I resolved to CHANGE MY BEHAVIOR.  Once and for all. I decided I was sick and tired of FOOD running my life for me.  I wanted to be in charge, instead!

And I knew I didn't need to be a supermodel or a size 0 or super-skinny.  All I needed -- all I ever wanted! -- was to be HAPPY when I look in the mirror. To LIKE what I see.  And to be able to move around, to be flexible, to do what I need to do to run my household and live my life.  To exercise at the gym without feeling like I'm reaching over a ton of BLUBBER in my stomach (oh yeah, that's how I felt....that's what I DID!....)  To not be ashamed of myself when I see pictures that people take.  To pull ANYTHING out of my closet and know it will not only fit, but it will fit without being uncomfortable or too tight.

To see the look in my husband's eyes when he sees me....watch his eyes light up like they do.  He always loved me...that hasn't changed...but that light in his eyes got a little bit brighter when I reached goal. 
And don't get me started on the changes in the bedroom LOL....I'll let you see for yourself.
wink wink

Suffice it to say, EVERYTHING is better.  Everything.  And damn it, I'm NEVER going back to where I was.  I like it here too much. 

So if I have to argue with Fat Brain on a daily basis, I WILL.  If I have to go back on the 5/1 periodically because I didn't pay enough attention, I WILL.  If I have to say 'NO' a zillion times to foods I'd LOVE to eat, I WILL.  Because that's momentary.  It's fleeting. It's gone in seconds....but my body I have to live with all day, every day.

I choose ME. 
And 'everything in moderation' does NOT apply.  Never did, never will!

YOU CAN DO IT.  Decide this is what you want....the goal is to change your relationship with food PERMANENTLY ....and you can get to goal and STAY THERE.

Keep on!